I have adapted a June 2017 Huffpo article to reflect that there is little difference between “managing” [business lingo] and having relationships with people [interpersonal lingo]. This information is from 9 Bad Manager Mistakes That Make Good People Quit
My adapted responses appear in orange, and bold to insert emphasis.
The original words appear as crossed out text to indicate the variation between being civil and what we’ve codified as “good business”. Maybe it’s good business to be a human being who is naturally rewarded by relating, rather than for profit.
9 bad relationship mistakes that make good people not like you or want to hang out with you
1. They overwork people. Nothing burns out a friend quite like overworking them. It’s so tempting to work your friends hard — we frequently fall into this trap. Overworking good friends is perplexing; it makes them feel as if they’re being punished for great performance.
Socially skilled and responsible people will take on a bigger
workload, but they won’t stay if the ir jobfriendship suffocates them in the process. Raises, promotions, and title-changesContributing to their wellbeing is are all acceptable ways to increase workload.may result in a closer friendship. If you simply increase workloadyour relationshipo demands because people are able talented, without changing a thing, they will seek another jobfriend that gives them what they deserve.
2. They don’t recognize contributions and reward good work. It’s easy to underestimate the power of a recognition, something for which we a
re pat on the back, especially with top performers who are intrinsically motivated. Everyone likes compliments kudos, none more so than those who work hard and give their all. Managers People, especially friends, need to communicate with their people to find out what makes them feel good (for some, it’s a raise; for others, it’s public recognition) and then to recognize their effort. reward them for a job well done. With top performers, this will happen often if you’re doing it right.
3. They fail to develop people’s skills. When
managers people reflect on are asked about their inattention to others employees, they try to excuse themselves, and blame the failure on someone other than themselves. using words such as “trust,” “autonomy,” and “empowerment.” This is complete nonsense. Good people connect, managers manage, no matter how restricted the skills of the other. talented the employee. They pay attention and are constantly listening and giving feedback. Management Relationships may have a beginning, but it they certainly ha sve no end. When you have meet a person talented employee, it’s up to you to keep finding areas in which you they can improve to expand their skill set your relationship. The most talented employees Healthy people want feedback—more so than the less talented healthy ones—and it’s your job to keep it coming. If you don’t, your best people potential friends will grow bored and leave complacent.
4. They don’t care about people.
their employees. More than half of people who don’t return your phone call, leave their jobs do so because of their just aren’t interested in pursuing a relationship with you their boss. Smart companies Caring people make certain their managers friends know how to balance being communicative with taking care of themselves. professional with being human. These are the bosses people who celebrate an employee’s success, empathize with those going through hard times, and challenge people, even when it hurts. Bosses People who fail to really care will always have high turnover rates, and feel continually isolated. It’s impossible to work for be with someone eight-plus hours a day for any amount of time when they aren’t personally involved and don’t care about anything other than your well being, with no attention to the well being of the relationship. production yield.
hire and promote befriend the wrong people. Good , hard-working employees people want to work hang out with like-minded folks professionals. When managers you don’t do the hard work of hiring maintaining good people as friends, it’s a major demotivator for those stuck working being alongside them. Promoting the wrong people bad friendships is even worse. When you work your tail off extend energy to a friendship only to get passed over for a promotion that’s given to someone who glad-handed their way to the top, poser, it’s a massive insult. No wonder it makes good people leave.
7. They don’t let people pursue their passions.
Talented employees People who are exciting to be with are passionate. Providing opportunities for them to pursue share and expand their passions with you improves their productivity and job satisfaction general happiness when they are with you. But too many people managers want people others to work perform within a little box. These managers people selfishly fear that their own self worth productivity will decline if they let people the other expand their focus and pursue their passions. This fear is unfounded. Studies show that people who are able to pursue their passions at work experience flow, a euphoric state of mind that is five times more productive, and infinitely more exciting and attractive, than the norm.
8. They fail to engage creativity. The most
talented employees exciting people seek to improve everything they touch. If you take away their ability to discourage their desire to change and improve things because you’re only comfortable with the status quo, this makes them hate and resent being with you their jobs. Caging up this innate desire to create not only limits them, it limits you. It limits the whole world.
9. They don’t challenge people intellectually. Great
bosses friends challenge their employees to accomplish things that seem inconceivable at first. Instead of setting mundane, incremental goals, They set lofty goals that push people out of encourage them to expand their comfort zones. Then, good managers they do everything in their power to help them succeed alongside them. When talented and intelligent people are bored find themselves doing things that are too easy or boring, they seek other jobs that will challenges to their intellects.
Bringing It All Together
If you want
your best friends, people to stay, you need to think carefully about how you treat them. While Good people employees are as tough as nails, their talent gives them have an abundance of options for friendships. You need to make them want to be with you, because you want to be with them. work for you.
What other mistakes cause you to miss out on potential friendships?
great employees to leave? Please share your thoughts in the comments section. I learn about people by listening and relating to them. as I learn just as much from you as you do from me.